Becoming The Peacemaker

Here is an article written for Christian Ladies Connect Online Magazine—

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Written by Chere Williams

One of the most challenging aspects of being a single mom is maintaining a good relationship with the father of your children. When a relationship ends between two people there is a period of adjustment, which can be a difficult and painful transition for the whole family. Through the grace of God and prayer eventually both the parents and children will become comfortable with their newly structured family situation. Inevitably you will hit a snag. That snag can be mended or it can unravel and make everything fall apart. The choice is yours. When disagreements occur, I urge you to refer back to Matthew 5:9, Blessed are the peacemakers for they shall be called the children of God.

I hit one of those snags not long ago. What began as a typical conversation with my daughter’s father soon turned into an ugly argument. I found a comment he made offensive, my buttons were pushed and unfortunately, I reacted. Lo and behold the conversation took on a life of its’ own. We basically get along and I had decided long ago not to argue with him or say words that I would later regret. After all, we had wonderful memories and a beautiful daughter together. I am wise enough to know that arguments never lead to anything positive or productive, but that day my smallest member, my tongue took control and wisdom flew out the window. We both hung up feeling angry and misunderstood.
Our separation was painful and we were working hard to make our relationship one of mutual respect and love. After putting my daughter to bed, I realized I needed to call him and apologize, not a flimsy or half hearted sorry, but an honest, genuine apology. Before I made the call I prayed that God would give me the right words to say to him. When I finally called, we almost apologized simultaneously. The weight of the argument was lifted off both our shoulders, but more importantly I felt right with God.

If, you are a single mom, most likely you are going to have a relationship with the father of your children for the rest of your life. Even if you both remarry you will always be connected through your children. It is your responsibility to make the best of that relationship. Sure, it takes two, however, you are not responsible for their actions. In the eyes of God you are responsible for your own words and actions. Take the initiative and be the Peacemaker. Even if you are convinced that you are 100% correct, swallow your pride and be the peacemaker because God is watching your actions. Treat him like Jesus would. Aren’t we supposed to show love and compassion to those we don’t even know? Than surely the person that we created a child with also deserves that understanding. Don’t view him as an ex, he is not someone that you can just “x” out of your life.
t is not easy to turn the other cheek, but God will bless you for it. There are a multitude of emotions that occur in a relationship that is in transition. You will have differences of opinion, and feelings may get hurt, but you can either let that snag unravel your foundation or you can patch it up and make it stronger. You are a child of God, therefore it is your duty to be a peacemaker and not cause strife, or spew harsh criticisms. Scripture instructs us to love one another and do as Jesus did.

It is imperative that we set the best example we possibly can for our children. We are responsible for modeling godly behavior. Do you want them to see mom and dad at each other’s throat? Worse, would you want them to emulate that behavior in their own relationships in the future? Everything we do as parents affects our children. When we’re arguing and holding grudges we are not showing mercy. Mercy is exactly what God wants us to give to one another as stated in Luke 6:36 May my children always “be merciful, as their Father is merciful. Children need to observe their parents treating one another with kindness and compassion.

Although the family dynamics have changed, let your children know through your actions that they are still part of a unit that works together. We all want the best for our children regardless if we are single, divorced, or married parents. What better way to give them the best than by showing them through the virtues of patience, kindness, and compassion.

Here are a few suggestions to try before a disagreement begins:
First and foremost look to God for guidance. If you have a contemptuous relationship and arguments begin with hello, pray first. Before you even speak with him, ask God to give you the right words to say.Choose your words carefullyBefore speaking, think about what you are saying, how you are saying it, and what you want to express. Remember the tongue is the littlest member, but can cause the most damage.

If an argument ensues, walk away. Heated discussions never resolve the issue. Once you have some distance from the situation you will have a better attitude. The initial anger will most likely dissolve and you are more likely to reach an agreement.

When you remember that he is created by our holy creator, your heart will soften which makes it difficult to be confrontational or angry.

Seek Counseling-Have the whole family participate in counseling with your church clergy, or a licensed family therapist.

I slept better that night knowing that I sincerely apologized and asked for God’s forgiveness. It is much easier to be a peacemaker than harbor anger and resentment. Let’s walk in the footsteps of Jesus, loving those around us, offering a kind word, and being compassionate.

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by Chere Williams

Meal Planning Made Easy- by Rachel Paxton

Here is an insightful article that has helped me out a good bit:

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It’s no fun trying to decide what to make for dinner every night. Planning your meals ahead of time often saves you time as well as money.

There are many different ways to plan your meals. How you plan yours depends on how much time you want to spend now to save yourself time later.

I plan my meals once a week. Because I have limited refrigerator/freezer space and a small family to feed (3), this plan seems to work best for me. I only go to the grocery store once a week. When I’m getting ready to go to the store, I sit down and starting planning my menu for the next week.

This is a good time to go through this week’s grocery ads to see what’s on sale this week. I also take this time to clean out my refrigerator to see what needs thrown away and what can be re-used as leftovers in the next couple of days. Cleaning out your refrigerator weekly is crucial in avoiding wasting food that could still be used to make a perfectly good meal.

So after I’ve cleaned out the refrigerator and scanned the grocery store ads, I start my shopping list. I try to plan around what I already have in the freezer. For example, if I know I have a pound of hamburger in the freezer and I know I have spaghetti noodles on hand, then I just need to put spaghetti sauce on my list in order to have spaghetti for dinner one night.

I’ve also found that often we don’t need as much meat in our meals as you might think. For our family of three, a pound of hamburger can be used for both spaghetti and tacos. If I cook the hamburger all at once, I can just put half of it in the refrigerator for the next meal (a big time savings!). If I already have taco shells on hand all I need is to make sure that the sour cream I have in the refrigerator is still good and put lettuce and tomatoes on my shopping list.

You should always stock up on meat when it’s on sale. If you do you’ll find that some weeks you’ll end up buying almost no meat at all, if any. I also stock up on items like jars of spaghetti sauce when they’re on sale. Then I’ll always have a quick dinner ready on a moment’s notice if I already have hamburger (also bought on sale) and spaghetti noodles on hand.

Some weeks I realize that I already have much of what I’m going to need for the week. Some of the staples I keep on hand: sour cream, cheese, taco shells, spaghetti noodles, egg noodles, cream of mushroom soup, onions, potatoes, garlic, tuna, spaghetti sauce, tomato sauce, black olives, canned clams, and rice. These ingredients make a lot of the meals we eat, like: hamburger and rice, beef stroganoff, tacos, spaghetti, clam chowder, and hamburger gravy and mashed potatoes.

I usually plan for only 5 meals a week. I know that sometime during the week we’ll be eating leftovers or fending for ourselves due to time constraints.

This system has worked really well for me and saved us lots of money. I plan once a week, shop once a week, and don’t give a thought to meal planning for the rest of the week. And I don’t hold myself to cooking a certain meal on a certain night. I usually decide that day what I’m going to cook for dinner to be a little flexible.

There are many other ways you can plan your meals. Some people cook once a month and freeze their meals for later use (requires a lot of freezer space). A couple of books on this subject are Frozen Assets by Deborah Taylor Hough and The Freezer Cooking Manual by Tara Wohlenhaus.

Meal planning doesn’t have to be hard. Modify your plan to suit your family’s needs. Just make sure you HAVE a plan. It will inevitably save you time as well as money.

Article by:

Orginally published at Suite 101. Rachel Paxton is a freelance writer and mom who is the owner of www.organized-mom.com, featuring the Easy Organizer, loaded with tools to help you plan, schedule, remember events, keep in touch, get your family on an organized schedule, prioritize, and more.

Ten Ways To Make Your House A Home

Here is a great article on making a home cozy:

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Our home is such an important part of our family’s life. Whether we work outside the home or are able to be at home, there are some basic things we can do to insure that our home is a place of refuge and security for our husband and children.

Here are ten tips to help accomplish this goal:

1. Keep it clean and tidy. That doesn’t mean we have to be immaculate housekeepers. If we do a daily tidy-up and a weekly housecleaning, our home life will be much more restful. Clutter is stressful. And keep the dishes caught up!

2. Nutritious food and family dinners. Fast food on the go is ok once in awhile, but not as a regular habit. Our children and husbands benefit from simple, nourishing meals and snacks. And having a regular, sit-down family dinner together has been shown to have many benefits.

3. Predictable routines. Our families thrive when things are on schedule. It gives a sense of stability. There should be regular times for eating, sleeping, chores, and homework. It also helps to build responsibility in children when they know they have to fulfill their responsibilities before they play.

4. Cozy and tastefully decorated. This does not in any way mean you house has to be magazine-beautiful. If our homes are inviting, cozy, comfortable, and decorated in a way that we and our families enjoy, that is sufficient. My living room doilies are from the 1940s and 1950s. Some were handmade. But they are pretty and I like them, so that is what I use.

5. Hospitality. Our kids, whether they are small or young adults, need to know that their friends are welcome. When my boys were grade-school age, they would have several friends come for sleep-overs. Many times, I would wake up in the morning and step over sleeping bags filled with boys on the floor. I would usually set the table with bowls and boxes of cereal for all of them to eat when they got up. I put myself out some, but it was worth it to make their friends feel welcome, and to get to know my sons’ friends.

6. Demonstrate love. Our children and husbands benefit greatly when we show our love for them in various ways. My husband might not have wonderfully romantic lines to say to me, but on snowy, icy mornings, he cleans off my car and scrapes the windshield before he leaves for work. So when I leave an hour later, I don’t have to do all of this. Love is a verb.

7. Mutual respect. Treat your husband and children with as much respect as you would guests. Good manners are contagious. Don’t discuss them in a negative way to other people, either. Be each other’s allies.

8. Words and tone of voice. This seems like a small thing, but it can make a huge difference. Have you ever been somewhere and overheard a mother insulting or degrading her children? Or a wife speaking to her husband with contempt? Or have you been in a store, and a woman yelled at her child so loudly and harshly that you jumped yourself?

We all have those days when we feel like acting like that. But if we think before we speak, following the Bible’s advice, our family relationships will be a lot more peaceful. Plus, we are setting a positive example for our children when it comes to dealing with others. Also, our voices sound much more feminine when they are soft and kind, not loud and harsh.

9. Positive attitudes toward family members. Smile often, use encouraging words, show your confidence in them. Listen when they talk, build them up, boost their confidence. When they have failed, assure them that they have succeeded in gaining wisdom and experience. Let them know you think highly of them.

10. Lastly, keep your sense of humor. Be able to laugh at yourself. Laughter can help everyone de-stress. Enjoy everyday moments with your family. They are your greatest treasure, your gift from God.
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Jessica Gerald has been an elementary school teacher for over thirty years, and is the publisher of the website http://www.oldfashionedhomemaking.com.

Interview with Marilyn Hontz- Shame Lifter

Shame. Unworthiness.  Abuse.

It isn’t talked about very often, but is such an essential topic to tackle. These issues should be brought out to the open so that we can begin to deal with the feelings that lie beneath the surface, and become healed of emotional wounds of the past.

Shame Lifter is a book …you won’t want to put down once you’ve begun.  From beginning to end, Marilyn holds the reader captive to the emotional ups and downs she endured along her life’s journey.

You’ll feel like laughing and crying all at the same time.  Some of you may relate to her story.

In the end, you’ll be happy, knowing what the author knows.

I had the wonderful opportunity to interview Marilyn Hontz, author of Shame Lifter, about her experiences with the all-too-familiar topic for many women- including women of faith.

–Demetria Zinga,

Christian Ladies Connect Editor

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Marilyn Hontz, author of Shame Lifter

CLC Mag: In your book you talk a good bit about “critical self talk”.  Can you explain this term and how the issue affects so many people today?

Marilyn: Critical self-talk is a product of the negative tapes we continually play over and over in our thoughts. These are sayings like, “I’m not good enough.” “I’m worthless,” “I’m fat,” I’m so dumb.” We begin to believe these lies as truth and, sadly, those messages end up defining us. This kind of talk limits and paralyzes us. That’s why it is so important to know God’s truth and His thoughts about you. He views you through eyes of incredible love and extreme grace. Isn’t it interesting that while we wouldn’t think of telling our children or others that they were worthless, dumb, or fat, we often times have no problem telling ourselves those same messages. Just recently I read a verse from Psalm 119:29 (NLT) that caught my attention…”Keep me from lying to myself…” That verse concludes by saying, “give me the privilege of knowing your instruction.” Or in other words, know God’s truth!

CLC Mag: In general, how do feelings of shame affect moms and women?

Marilyn: Shame will affect the thoughts and actions of anyone, but I’ve talked to many women who believe they aren’t adequate as a mom, a wife, friend or person. Many live with lots of “if only” regrets. Shame bogs a person down and tells one, “You’re no good.” Often times a woman compares her weaknesses to other women’s strengths. Or she may feel that her children are not doing as well as other children and she ends up internalizing feelings of shame. One of the lies of shame is to believe that we are the only one dealing with a particular issue. As a result we may withdraw, or feel embarrassed, abnormal, or different from others. Shame makes us feel isolated – alone.

CLC Mag: What about parenting?  How does a person’s parental style play a role in the way she influences a child’s self-perception?

Marilyn: The parent is generally the first primary influence on a child’s sense of worth. In my case my dad’s and my mother’s parenting styles greatly influenced my self-perception. My mother was very loving and affirming. When she disciplined me it was for the purpose to teach – not to tear me down. She was kind and affirming. When I messed up she handled it with grace-filled words. I felt valued and loved by her. My dad’s style, however, was just the opposite. He could be aloof while at other times his style made me fearful. One day, for example, when I was four I was riding in the car and I started to cry about something. My dad got frustrated with me and finally stopped the car alongside the road and got out. He told me to get out of the car. He then set my small suitcase on the shoulder of the road and left me there while he drove off down the road. That experience made me very fearful, I wondered, as I stood on that deserted road if he would ever come back for me. For years I lived with the fear of being left or abandoned. Not only did his actions shape me, but his words did as well. He told me numerous times that I was “just a follower and not a leader.” I believed him and thought that meant I was not competent to be in charge of anything or to make wise decisions on my own. His way to parent me was more through punitive measures than edifying words. Proverbs 18:21 says, “The tongue can bring death or life” Truly our words have the power of life and death.”

CLC Mag: It’s great to be able to point out the feelings once we recognize them.  What are some of the key indicators in determining if a person is wrestling with shame?

Marilyn:  If you had parents who were emotionally shut down you may not have been affirmed. That tends to give a child the message that they are not good enough. A person who has been physically, emotionally, or sexually abused will experience toxic shame. Or perhaps someone made fun of your body and to this day you can still hear their hurtful comments. Again, those kinds of experiences produce shame and unless dealt with, have a tendency to paralyze you. Here are a few other indicators that may reveal if a person deals with shame: he or she may tend to be people pleasers, yet they can easily put him or herself down. Generally they deal with daily self-rejection while, interestingly, at the same time, may tend to be a perfectionist. I believe one of the biggest indicators of shame, though, is a person’s negative internal thoughts. Recurring messages like: I’m worthless, unwanted, weak, dirty, inadequate, etc. If you know of someone who goes around saying those kinds of comments about him or herself, he or she is generally dealing with unhealthy shame and most likely have a shame-based perspective of life.

CLC Mag: In your book, you describe some very painful incidents with your father growing up which played a large role in your self-perception. Finally as an adult and after much prayer and reflecting you were able to deal with the results. How difficult was it to actually wade through the emotions of the past and start over again in your thought life (as well as forgive him)? How can others do the same?

Marilyn: To be candid, wading through the lies I believed, the emotions of my past and dealing with forgiveness was a long and difficult journey, but I knew it was a journey that needed to be taken. (It ended up being very worth it in the end!) I had to start with small memories. For example, my dad told me to make sure I didn’t stay too long at friend’s houses because they would get tired of me. The message I received from him was, “I am a burden.” Later on I had to distinguish what was truth in those messages and what were lies. By the way, I’ve found it so helpful to share the lies you believe about yourself with safe people – a “grace group.” I cited earlier about the emotions I went through when my dad left me on the side of the road. Years later as I thought more about that memory, the Lord enabled me to see that memory through a different lens for a deeper healing. At first when I looked at that memory I only saw a little girl standing along side the road with her small suitcase beside her. Finally, I was able to look at that memory and not only see a little child and her suitcase along the side of the road, but I also saw my Savior, Jesus standing next to me. He was crying with me. So often we get God and life mixed up. I was to learn that God did not leave me along side the road, my dad did. Jesus, however, was with me all of the time. He never abandoned me. That was a powerful image for me. Total forgiveness for my dad did take time, but thankfully the Lord eventually helped me to replace the bitterness and unforgiveness with genuine compassion and love for him. I saw the word, “give” right in the middle of the word forgiveness. Forgiveness is costly. You have to give. But then I think of Jesus and what it cost Him to forgive us and the “give” for Him was His life. If you are struggling to forgive someone, but aren’t there yet, I suggest a visual that author Chuck Lynch wrote about – The “Jesus Jail.” Mentally picture a jail cell and then picture putting the person who has hurt or abused you in that jail. This is a temporary holding place. You are saying to the Lord, “I know I need to forgive him or her, but I need your help. I am placing him or her in your Jesus Jail for you to deal with that person the way You want to. I am relinquishing this person to you with my hands off. I will not take revenge – I leave them with you.” Every time you start to have hard feelings toward that person, you say, “No, I don’t have to fret about this person…God is in charge of them right now.” It is so freeing when you, one day, get to the place where you open the cell door and release the person from the Jesus Jail. Actually, what you’ve done is freed yourself. Oh what sweet peace God gently rains down upon you as you allow Him to help you forgive a person who has wounded you.

CLC Mag: How did you cope spiritually and practically when your mother passed away? How can others who have experienced the loss of a loved one they depended on emotionally cope through their time of grief?

Marilyn: Spiritually, I found myself at a crossroad when my mom died. I had a decision to make. I could either blame God and move away from Him or chose to move toward Him. I decided to give God a chance. I had to transfer my dependence from my mother to the Lord. In turn, I became desperate for God. I’m so glad I did. He was there for me. Coping practically after a death of a loved one is different for every person. Some may find journaling therapeutic or talking with others may be helpful. You may want to join a grief recovery support group. Don’t ignore your feelings! Grieving is a process, yet the way people go through it can vary. I believe most people want to talk about their loss. I did. I wanted people to share a meaningful memory of my mom with me. If you know someone who has recently lost a loved one, be there for him or her. Listen. Send them encouraging cards once a month. (By the way, sometimes the second year is even harder because not so many people take the time to see how you are doing.) Email or make some phone calls. If possible, send them a card on the anniversary date of the death of their loved one to let them know you remembered. Finally, for me, the Bible was and continues to be a great comfort. The Holy Spirit is our Counselor and Comforter. He has used the following verse numerous times to help fill my grieving heart with hope: “Lord when doubts fill my mind, when my heart is in turmoil, quiet me and give me renewed hope and cheer” Psalm 94:19 Living Bible Version.

CLC Mag: When a person is rejected by someone very close to them, what are some practical steps he/she can take in order to move past the rejection into acceptance of themselves?

Marilyn: Rejection, no matter whom or where it comes from is extremely hard to receive. It’s so deeply personal. When someone has rejected me I try to remember that many times that person was hurt or wounded in some way. The saying is true, “hurt people, hurt people.” I’ve learned that I cannot fix or change that person. I can, however, ask the Lord to work on me as I go through that crushing experience of rejection. Here are some practical steps that may help if someone has rejected you: Is there a safe person you could share your feelings of rejection with? Or perhaps you could find a godly professional counselor you could confide in who would help you distinguish between the truth and lies that swirl around in your thoughts from the rejection. Sometimes writing a letter (NOT to send) to the person that has rejected you may help. It gives you an opportunity to actually see your thoughts on paper. Journaling about the rejection through a letter to God can also be therapeutic. And it could be that after all you’ve tried, you may have to set some boundaries or place some distance between you and the other person. Always remember, though, that there is One who truly understands what it’s like to be rejected – it is the Lord Jesus Christ. I Peter 2:4 NLT says, “…He was rejected by people…” How wonderful to know that whatever is going on in your life today Jesus understands and says to you, “I will never fail you. I will never abandon you.” (Hebrews 13:5) You are His beloved child – you are royalty!

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To order Shame Lifter or to find out more about Marilyn Hontz, please visit the Tyndale publishing site.

Book Review: Anointing For Healing

Authors Melanie Hemry and Gina Lynnes weave together a series of inspiring true stories of how several people received real, authentic healing in their lives.

This book, a beautiful little package complete with a bottle of aromatic anointing oil, lifted my spirits and encouraged me to remember that Christ is indeed our Healer.

Contact your local Christian book store, or order directly online from Whitaker House.

by Cyndi Aarestad

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God is not some distant cosmic being who is far removed from the everyday life of us mere mortals.

He is not accessible only to a select few, nor is the criteria for meeting Him based on race, age, gender, location, intellect or anything else, other than a sincere heart that seeks Him.

He provided the way to come directly to Him when He sent His son, Jesus to earth to bring salvation to all people. Jesus bridged the chasm between God & man, opening the doorway to God’s throne room.

FOREVER. UNLIMITED ACCESS. 24/7. He’s always on call, never too busy and always welcoming.

So for those who have accepted Christ’s invitation of salvation, there comes the assurance of His abiding presence in their lives, His willingness to participate in every aspect of their existence and His desire to share in every moment of their lives. From the mundane to the monumental.

Through the tragedies and the triumphs, victories and defeats, struggles and celebrations. He’s there through it all and He wants us to learn to see Him and seek Him in the midst of every circumstance. HE IS ALWAYS THERE.

Sometimes we just need our eyes opened and our spirits tuned in. I’ve found it so, and I’ve learned that some of the most profound moments with God come in the middle of everyday living. He meets us where we are and He reveals Himself in unexpected ways. We just have to be watching for Him.

• Christ encountered the Samaritan woman at the well as she was doing her water-fetching chore. He called Matthew away from his work in the middle of a busy day.
• He recruited the fishermen while they mended their nets, calling them to a new vocation.
• Mary was informed that she was God’s chosen vessel while she did ordinary things on an ordinary day.
• Moses was out tending sheep when a burning bush ushered him into the very presence of God.

The Bible is filled with these stories of God encounters during life’s common moments. Only those moments weren’t common any longer. They changed lives, they changed people, they changed history. All because God revealed Himself where and when He was least expected.

He hasn’t changed. His word tells us that He is the same yesterday, today and forever. He is always faithful and He walks with us moment by moment. Our eyes are sometimes blinded by unbelief or dimmed by the rationalizations of our minds, but He is still there. He abides – in us and with us, waiting for us to recognize His hand, His presence, His beauty, His strength, His peace, His comfort, His help, His wisdom, His love, His joy, His guidance.

Let Him reveal Himself to you while you go about your day, living it as a sacrifice of praise to Him. When we worship Him in all we do, He is magnified, and we will see Him in a clearer, brighter way. We will be aware of His presence and His workings when our vision is altered, when we’re looking through the Son-glasses, instead of my-focals!

So, start watching for what God is doing in your life, and through the eyes of faith you will see!

Practicing Early Time With God

“Spending time with God is something every Christian woman should set aside time for.”

Perhaps this is a fairly common statement that we’ve heard all too often.  We all know this to be true, and yet it still seems to be a most incredible struggle to obtain that blessed time with God each and every day of our lives.

So, how do we wear all the hats and still have time to be still and quiet in God’s presence?

How do we make the time to sit quietly before our Savior when our toddlers are stampeding through our living rooms with permanent markers only inches away from our furniture and walls?

When do we find the time to say a prayer long enough to our Savior before we are interrupted with “MOM!  She hit me!”, or “Honey, I can’t find my keys!”

True, we all wear different hats—some of us are mothers, some of us are married, many of us work from home or have full time jobs outside of the home…but, one thing we all have in common is our need for the peace of God in our lives.  We all need the Lord!

With that said, let’s talk for a minute about some practical things we can do each day to allow the Lord first place in our lives.  We are not only discussing our time in general with God each day, but the fact that we can also give God the first of each day.

“Impossible!” you might exclaim…but it’s true.  We can do this!  I am a living witness that despite the busy-ness of each morning, it is quite possible for me to give God the very first few minutes of my day.

Try the following steps for 21 days and see if you’ll notice a difference in your outlook on life.  Also note any changes in your relationship with God.  You’ll most definitely feel more aware of how close the Lord really is to you, especially during many of your stressful times!

In addition, take note of your relationships to your family and friends, and to people around you.  As you spend time, and early time with the Lord, you will find your relationships with others changing as your heart changes.  Your heart will change because you start to become more like Christ as you draw closer to Him in fellowship each and every morning when you first awake.

Here’s how to make early time with God happen:

1.) Upon awaking each morning, thank God for a brand new day.  Believe it or not, this very small act of gratitude takes you a long way during your stress throughout the day.

2.) Look out your window.  Appreciate the nature. Thank God for what you see.  Observe the weather.  Whether it is raining or sunny, thank God for the weather.  If it’s raining, don’t complain, but thank God for the rain. Thank Him for the sun.  Thank Him for the birds in the air and the trees.  Thank God for His handiwork.

3.) If your children and husband are still asleep, that means you still have time to spend with God!  So get started!  Open your bible and read some scripture, then MEDITATE on it.  Think about what it means to you.  Consider how you might apply the scriptures to your life that day.

4.) Journal your thoughts and prayers to the Lord. Haven’t invested in a journal yet?  Get yourself one—it doesn’t have to be the cutest and most expensive journal.  You could even buy an inexpensive notebook…but do keep one on hand for your prayer times.  Keeping a journal will help you monitor your growth in your relationship with Christ throughout the years.

5.) If you are still the only one up for the morning, now you can take the time to retreat to a place in your house where you won’t awaken anyone, and talk out loud to the Lord. Talking out loud does several things for you.  Haven’t you noticed that when we simply keep our thoughts inward and never verbalize them, many times they don’t feel real to us? But once we verbalize our thoughts, they become tangible.  It’s the same with our prayers to our Savior.  When we can, we should try talking out loud to Him as we would anyone else.  It helps us to realize the tangibility of our Lord, and that He is as real as talking to our friends and family, and actually hears us.  Talking out loud also cements our prayers and thoughts in reality.  As our voice echoes our resounding prayers and conversations with God, we are able to hear these prayers with our own ears, and are confirmed with our hearts the truth and reality of our relationship with God, because after all, we were just talking to Him!

Do you see how spending time with God first thing upon awaking each morning is not only possible but quite do-able, even for those of us with the most hectic schedules?

We can do this!

The benefits of spending time with our Savior each morning are awesome.

We’ll begin to notice our hearts become more pliable to His word.

We’ll start to notice a difference in our feelings toward others and our relationships with family, friends, and co-workers.

We’ll find the peace of God transcending our thoughts and minds.

We’ll begin to notice how strong and steadfast we are as we stand firm in our faith.

As God becomes our rock and our fortress, we’ll find ourselves unmoved by the chaos and stressors of life.

Let’s aim to strive for early time with our Savior.  Once you begin to implement this discipline, your life is sure to change!

Have A Little Faith

There were moments in my life when I didn’t feel that I could possibly start a business.  The timing wasn’t right, I didn’t have enough experience, I was too young…my excuses went on and on.

Finally, one day I felt a twinge of excitement as I discovered that one of my hobbies of making homemade soaps could actually turn into a somewhat profitable business.  I leapt forward into the world of business, learning the ins and outs of beginning my very first home-based business start up- keeping up with records, filing taxes, and managing the production and sales of each of my precious creations.  Needless to say, it wasn’t long before I had stretched my entrepreneurial interests into other areas and found the faith to begin businesses in technology and website design.

None of this would have ever happened had I hidden behind my excuses of “can’ts”.  All too often we succumb to failure, or worse yet, never taking those necessary steps to begin with, in order to make things happen in our lives.

In Matthew 11: 22-24, Jesus says: “Have faith in God. ²³ For assuredly, I say to you, whoever says to this mountain, ‘Be removed and be cast into the sea,’ and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that those things he says will be done, he will have whatever he says. ²⁴ Therefore I say to you, whatever things you ask when you pray, believe that you receive them, and you will have them.”

God gives us the power to write our destinies.  We decide to succeed or fail.  We decide to speak to the mountain or not.  We decide to doubt…or to believe.

It’s up to us.

Why don’t you start today to believe God for the things you’ve been needing in your life?  Start by igniting the faith within you to believe for the impossible.  Believe for the things that don’t seem quite so likely to happen.  Stretch your faith to reach past the limits of the sky, and watch God do some incredible things for you!

He’s Faithful

Every morning I wake up to the sound of chirping birds, singing their love songs to God.  I often wonder how it is that birds are so cheerful, even on cloudy days. When the skies were overcast and I wanted nothing more than to simply sleep, even the sound of those cheerful birds didn’t awaken me.

Sleep is a big word for me.  As a new mother, I’ve developed an appreciation for mothers of two children or more who have succeeded at parenting despite the odds, challenges, and struggles.  They are an inspiration to me and help me to see what it means to be balanced.

There are times that I can’t help but to quip with God, “Okay, Lord, another day of work, work, work.  How do you expect me to do this?”  Working a full time job and balancing family life had been quite a challenge to me – both hectic and nauseating at times.

Although there were many times I wanted to give up at the end of each day, I only woke up the next morning to a nest of chirping birds, seemingly reminding me that God’s mercies are new every morning.

I’ve found that in spite of the difficulties life brings, God’s presence is always there.  He lets me know that He is with me and that He’ll never leave me.  Even in my daily challenges, which may seem minute and trivial to others, God is an ever present help.  What a faithful Savior!

As I look up at the morning skies through my bedroom window, I see a vast array of colors: hues of blue, red, and yellow.

The sun gently rising on the horizon and spreading a host of brilliant colors my way, I have a sudden moment of clarity – a certainty that God is faithful.

Just as He transforms the night sky into a beautiful morning tapestry, I rest assure that He has every intention of turning our lives into that panorama of beauty…the kind of beauty that only results from our every day challenges in life.

What Is Your Ideal Vacation?

I’ve spent a good deal of my summer trying to figure out what to do with myself , my husband, and my two little girls- age 1 and 7.

What to do, what to do.

Well…I knew I had birthday parties to plan, music lessons to get my children to, and of course play dates.  But I wondered what I would do for myself that would give me the much-needed vacation I felt I deserved. I’d worked hard at a long, productive year of homeschooling, plucked slowly, but steadily toward my business goals, amidst balancing the daily tasks of family life (like cleaning, organizing, raising kids)…and now I NEEDED a vacation!

But that got me to thinking.   What are vacations, really?

A getaway at the beach, a fabulous weekend at a ritzy resort, swimming at the lake, birthday parties, summer sports matches…all of these sound like wonderful fun.

But what does our heart tells us a true vacation is?

What a vacation might be for you, may look like an entirely different ordeal when the ball is in my court.  But not only do we differ as individual women in the way we view a time of rest and peace, but God sees His wonderful creation in a total light- He sees us as needing rest in a whole other dimension.

You see, when God gives us rest, He doesn’t necessarily give us a free pass at the spa with our name on it.  He doesn’t necessarily give us a summer of fun outings, great food, and a host of friends…although these things are great, and typically make up our ideals of a perfect summer vacation.

What God sees when He looks upon His beautiful women, is the desire to give us true rest and peace.  This kind of peace comes from within, given to us by the power of God Himself.  This kind of vacation is rest in its truest definition.  Apart from our summer fun and frolic, our Lord wants to crown us with the kind of “peace that passes all understanding”; the kind of peace that sticks with us no matter the chaos surrounding us.

After a good bit of reflection, I came to the conclusion that what a vacation really means to me is a closer fellowship with my Lord. Although I am planning a beach getaway for July, I’ve decided that time spent alone with the Father in the midst of my harried days is far more valuable to me than any big vacation I have planned.

And I figured– that way, I could not only enjoy my “vacation” during the summer, but year round.

What does a vacation mean to you?

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